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October 4th, 2004

01:09 pm
Note to ClashCollapse )
Current Mood: thankfulapologetic

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01:05 pm - Dear Diary...
Bloody little brat of a Montgomery. Didn't think she had it in her to talk to a Misfit that way. After she's been so flipping useful and entertaining lately, too. Suppose it's not her fault if her little world is crumbling around her.

Should talk to her. She could mess things up proper, if she chooses. Besides, I've sort of got used to having her around. What the bloody bollocksy hell difference does it make if I'm married or not?

Somehow, though, whenever I start to explain things to Clash I get distracted. Better drop the uppity little thing a nice soothing note instead, and then go have a chat to our Pizzazz. Want to make sure Roxy and Stormer front up this afternoon and play along nicely, and then we have a wedding to plan. Better tell Pizzazz it will be in Westminster Abbey so she'd better cough up for a really smashing dress and trousseau. Stupid Americans, they'll swallow anything. Except Roxy.

The things a girl has to do for a Visa. I'll be kissing up to Jem next. The real one. I have the other one more or less in hand.
Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful

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September 29th, 2004

09:36 am - message on Craig Phillips' answering machine
Well, ducky, much as it goes against my dear old Mum's advice to leave anything on the record, if you won't keep answering the cheery little tinkle of your phone I s'pose I have no choice.

You've had long enough to kick over the traces now. Dear old Eric has arranged a press conference this afternoon, and I have enough on my hands to make sure Pizzazz turns up beaming with joy and our little Stormer with tears of joy in her eyes about welcoming her darlin' bandmate as her real sister at last. Roxy - well, I can handle our Roxy. So your job, love of my life, is to work out the details of a really ace story of how we met - visiting your dear little Mary in the bosom of the Misfits, love at first sight but you never thought a loser like you had a chance with a such a gorgeous and aristocratic rock star, the starry-eyed England when you realised I had as many aristocratic connections as your bandmates - you'll come up with something utterly smashing, I know. Andy and Fergie will have nothing on this little romance.

Might be an idea to come up with some wrong-side-of-the-beddie-blanket connections of your own. Just an idea.

Just in case you couldn't be buggered showing or you're having any stupid ideas of saying something difficult, you should know I can make things really hard on your sweet little Mary right now. Pizzazz'll kick her out on her cute little arse the moment I let a little something out to the Press. And that's not all, dear old boy. Imagine what it will do to Stormer's reputation if I just suggest the reason you hightailed it back to the Uk had something to do with how close you and your sister are. Very, very close, from all I've gathered. So close that... Well.

I have this little knack of being believed. Must be my wide-eyed innocence. And my poor ducky of a Stormer is so... sensitive. And Aja, bless her, has such a suspicious turn of mind for a goody-goody Hologram.

See you at one o'clock, lovie. I prefer orchids to roses. They have such a sentimental value when it comes to our little love affair.

Ta-ta, ducks.
Current Mood: deviousdevious

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September 27th, 2004

01:11 am - Dear old Diary
I can't believe that ugly little wierdo rejected my girl plaything! If she's good enough for me, then he's not fit to have her spit on him. Though he's bloody lucky he did, because if he'd laid one hand on her I would have made sure it wouldn't do him any ruddy good, and Eric would have sulked for a month. Pizzazz is one thing. But that repulsive little git is another cup of tea with sour milk entirely. Not having my pretty little Clash all slimed up.

I think she's feeling a little better, though, after I promised her that he's made Pizzazz her shining female-symbol thingies for the concert we'll go see how much medical attention it takes to remove a saxophone. Strike that. Not messing up my lovely sax, especially with such lovely new songs to use it on.

Besides, a bass guitar would hurt more, and really send Roxy bonkers.

I think our Constance was feeling a tad better when she tiptoed off to dreamland. The most ripping cure for getting one's knickers in a knot is, after all, to deal with the knickers.

Should sleep, too. Need to be bright and brilliant come cockrow. Have to come up with some kind of reasonable explanation as to why I couldn't be buggered mentioning to Cl Pizzazz that Stormer and I are about to become sisters.
Current Mood: tiredtired

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September 18th, 2004

12:15 pm - In diary, Lin-Z's studios
Pizzazz certainly has her advantages as a friend. I'll take Saville Row over Paris any day, but these will do quite well for the time being. And Europeon royalty are awfully freehanded with the titles, must bear that in mind. Could come in useful.

Must admit I like jetting off around the world at a moment's notice. No way I'm giving this up for a bedsit in the strictures of royal life.

But all is not peachy perfect in Jetta's little world. I must admit Clash makes a fabulous Jem, and some of the things she said will have me shrieking for hours. Not as loud as the Holograms will shriek, I expect. My little Clash is in Pizzazz's good books, all right, judging by the way she was all over her in the interview - now that should grab us a few headlines. Outrageous, all right. I'll admit in the privacy of this diary that I was feeling a little jealous, which might explain why I wasn't my usual sparkling best in the interview, although I couldn't tell you which girl I was most jealous of. Just don't like being left out, I guess.

Not that it bloody matters. Knew when I joined up that anything we wanted was subject to what our little goddess wanted, and I guess I like it that way. It's - uncomplicated. And, hell, I like pleasing Pizzazz as much as anyone. Should stop bloody whingeing and just enjoy watching the pretty display. And oh, is it pretty. And hot.

But what the hell was Clash doing, throwing out hints about Kimber and Stormer? Serves me fucking right for getting sentimental over the girl, I'm sure I spill more than I want to in bed. If Pizzazz takes it seriously rather than as an attempt to embarass the little Hologram slut, I'm in big trouble. Not that neon green fireworks aren't a laugh, but bang goes my hold over Stormer, and it's gone beyond a few new songs, now, given the advice Pizzazz's lawyers were kind enough to give me. I don't think the lazy little tramp has even talked to her brother yet.

Unless - oh, bugger it. The Holograms haven't turned up yet, and maybe forcing the ruddy issue will get things moving.

I'm sure Lin-Z won't turn down a soundbite like announcing a blue-blooded rock star's secret engagement on her pathetic little show. And it's almost true.
Current Mood: mixed

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August 25th, 2004

01:21 pm - Dear Diary,
I could not be more flipping proud of Clash if I was her own mum.

That's a creepy thought. Scratch that.

Pizzazz hasn't bothered to set up a lawyer's appointment for me, but that's my own fault for expecting her to do anyone a favour. Doesn't matter. The words "I'm Miss Gabor's friend" are like "Abracadabra" in certain circles. Set up a chat for this afternoon, to see if certain little ideas I'm having will come to anything.

Besides, I'm finding it hard to be mad with Pizzazz for anything right now. Puts on a lovely show, that girl.

Must have the nice lawyer suggest a nice safe bank for the footage. Nothing is safe around this place.
Current Mood: enthralled

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August 21st, 2004

01:39 am
Dear Stormer,

Ta ever so for our lovely little poolside chat. So glad to know you're being sensible, dearie. This is just a little friendly reminder so you won't forget what we agreed. The new songs will do just brilliantly for a start, although you might want to work on the beginning of that last one. Seems a little slow-paced for the Misfits. I'd almost think You're not writing female folk songs for your darling little duets novelty album now, love.

Interesting choice of lyrics, though. All I can say is that I'd be very careful indeed if I was you.

Don't worry about a thing when it comes to that, now I come to mention it. I'd never get in the way of your precious little friendship, and your secret is safe with me. Any help you need arranging meetings, and Jetta's your girl. I've always had a soft spot for perv love and friendship.

It's Pizzazz I feel bad for. What with you and your little friend and solo project, and Roxy running off on the group every time she gets her nose out of joint, it seems I'm the only Misfit she can truly rely on. I'd hate her to be betrayed by her own again. I'm sure you'd hate the consequences, too. But you're going to be a good girl and behave, aren't you?

Speaking of which, do remember me to your hunk of a brother. So lovely and convenient that he's in the US right now - why, you'd almost think it was fate! Give him my love - and remember what we talked about, Stormer. Oh, I know you said you never ever would agree to my simple little request, but I'm sure you've hd enough time to think it over now, and see that old Jetta is right.

You've let Craig fail the Misfits once before. It's not going to happen again, or you'll regret it, I promise you.

yours very fondly,

P.S. Say a word to anyone about our little girl talk, and I'll cut off your curls and give them to Clash as a souvenier.

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August 17th, 2004

12:51 pm - note pushed under Pizzazz's door
Dear Pizzazz,

I know better than to wake you before three, darling ducks, but when you've had a chance to restore yourself to your usual spectacular self, I have a tiddly little favour to ask the best and most powerful friend in all the world. I know it's Sunday, but I feel the sudden need for a nice little chat to a lawyer. Use your influence to arrange it, will you, my love? I'm sure it will be easy for someone like you. That adorable gent who managed my return to the US after our last trip there should do.

Just a little niggling issue, Pizzazz love, but it looks like your Jetta will be staying in your Misfits for the forseeable future. Let joy and jubilation rule supreme. Roxy and Stormer will be so happy for us.

By the way, the song is fabulous. Who would have thought a soppy little thing like Stormer could write like that? And I'd love Clash to be Jem in the film clip. After all, the poor little love deserves some consolation after her disappointment, doesn't she? Your wish being my command, after all.

That is, assuming she doesn't die of joy over seeing how glorious you look in black vinyl. What's the death count in heart attacks among your fans now, sweetie?

kisses and love,

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12:41 pm - note pushed under Stormer's door
Dear Stormer,

Sleeping in late today? Or are you hard at work? I heartily approve. All play and no work makes for a dull Misfit who might have some explaining to do to Pizzazz. By the way, the lyrics are quite interesting. Well done - Pizzazz is rapt. I see hope for you already.

If you're not too busy today, my old dear, I'd very much appreciate a private chat. It's too long since we had a cuppa and a nice girl talk. I'll be out at the pool, most likely. I'll expect you. Toot sweet.

If I'm in my room or the hot tub, better knock first. Just to be on the safe side.

XXXXX your dear friend Jetta

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August 16th, 2004

11:49 pm - Dear diary,
Well, as Mum used to say, learn a little every day, and it's not a waste. Even if what she learned seemed to be mostly off Eastenders and Neighbours. Any old how, I've done her proud tonight. Learned quite a lot of interesting things.

Never would have thought Stormer was the kind to sneak sweets into her room. Horrible sickly-sweet strawberry ones, too. Oh, well, there's no accounting for tastes, even if I prefer something spicier myself, not mention something not quite so cheap and soiled from being handled by so many grubby hands.

Never expected Stormer to have such a temper, although blubbing like a baby is like her. Not that it got her anywhere. I don't care if she bawls, so long as she also writes. I expect results by morning - it didn't look like she was planning to get much shut-eye even before I turned up to check on her.

Now that I think of it, "Who Is He Kissing?" had a fab sax solo at the start, not that I'd admit to Pizzazz I noticed. Wonder how they faked it - synthesiser? Kimber is obviously wasting her talents writing for a rubbish bubblegum band like the Holograms, but I don't think that will last long. After all, sugar rots your teeth, and I'm sure Jem would be interested to know what her innocent little keyboardist has been eating on the sly.
Current Mood: ecstaticelated

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